Sunday, April 16, 2006
Arbitrary Box Office Results for the Weekend of April 14, 2006
It's either the weather or the holiday, but the movies were dead tonight. Here are my best guesses at weekend grosses judging by the dismal performance of my own theater.
1. I Hated This Movie When It Was Called Madagascar (The Wild): 19.3 million. At least Madagascar had David Schwimmer.
2. That other movie with animals (Ice Age 2): 13.4 million. Ray Romano is no Schwimmer either.
3. Running a dumb idea into the ground (Scary Movie 4): $13.3 million. I bet somebody in this movie gets hit in the crotch.
4. David Spade is still alive? (The Benchwarmers): $10.2 million. He's getting fat off of his royalty checks for Racing Stripes, I'm sure.
5. Dancing with the Mexican (Take the Lead): $7.3 million. I can't really think of a joke, so I'll just keep going with the Mexican theme. Nachos nachos taquitos nachos.
Not making the top five: Lucky Number Flive. Because Flive is also not a number.
If I get them all right, somebody will send me an Ovaltine decoder ring. And then...THE WORLD!
And if you wondered why there was a picture of a poorly costumed Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man...I don't really know either.
Arbitrary Box Office Results for the Weekend of April 7, 2006 (and the Results)
Arbitrary Box Office Results for the Weekend of March 31, 2006 (and the Results)