Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Trailer Trash and all that jazz


Yeah, some more tasty links in addition to your usual motion-picture-trailers. Drink more Ovaltine.

First, the trailers.
  • Matt Damon and Angelina Jolie star in a shitty movie called The Good Shepherd, which looks to be a remake of that shitty movie called The Skulls.

  • Because the artists behind the original didn't say everything they needed to say with it, they're returning for Van Wilder: Rise of Taj (a sequel so awful that even the B-list star of the original refused to appear).

  • Travel back in time to the year 1999, when hopes had not yet failed for the Star Wars prequels and also there was some civil war in Africa. This Leonardo DiCaprio movie is about the latter.
And then all of your old friends stop by for an iced-cream sundae!
  • Cousin Balki, Cousin Larry, the dance of joy, and X-Entertainment: a match made in Halloween heaven.

    • Though Larry's character was more of a foil, and only given lightweight personality quirks like "impulsive" and "paranoid" and "gonna try to buy this $2 item for $1," here we learn that he's a Halloween fan. There are people who celebrate Halloween, and there are people who eat, sleep and breathe Halloween. Larry Appleton falls into the latter category, and I love him to death for it.

  • Apparently all of the Marvel Superheroes turned into zombies, making nerds across the country cream their pants in double-time. iMockery brings you the good word.

    • So after Marvel realized they had a great potential spin-off on their hands, the story picks up right after Magneto has destroyed the teleporter after the young and healthy Ultimate Fantastic Four have crossed back to their home dimension. Magneto realizes at this point that he is surrounded by zombies, and quite possibly completely fuxored.

  • Emily at Progressive Boink revisits her past in Food-Network form.

    • Anyone who has every read anything I've ever written ever knows that I also really like his show because he's kind of a dreamboat. Though possibly gay. Not that gay would make me like him less. It would probably make me like him more. Because I'm a fucking hag. Next week I'm posting a list about 20 awesome reasons to watch the Logo network. They all involve "Armistead Maupin's Tales of the City" and Olympia Dukakis' dick.

  • Mystie at CrownCombo brings home the bacon in this tribute to an anime Powerpuff Girls.

    • The series isn't as vibrantly girly as say, Wedding Peach or Saint Tail, but it packs a punch for magical girl anime! The new costume designs are terrific, and I'm looking forward to all the adaptations that will be filling the hallways of anime and comic book cons to come. I'm betting on seeing the series state-side in the future.

  • Allison at Retrojunk brings to light the greatest (dirtiest?) Saturday Night Live sketch of all time.

    • In fact, the word “penis” was spoken seventeen times, and sung twenty-six times, for a grand total of forty-three (!) times. That is a lot for a sketch that ran between three and five minutes long. But, still, I don’t see a problem, and I honestly don’t know anyone who does. But, in 1988, it may have been a different world. I know it was to me – I was almost six years old when this aired. I would never have been allowed to see it. I don’t know too many kids who would have been. But, today, who knows? It seems tame by today’s standards. If this sketch aired now, it probably wouldn’t even get a second look from any easily offended parties.

  • Wes at Scary Crayon is haiku-in' with the best of 'em.

  • Celebrities love to appear in Japanese advertisements, and Cracked's got the best of 'em.

    • “Lovers of your movies are clamoring for your public touch. You agree to make autograph for sexy sexy twins. But there is one more–they are triplets! Sexy times THREE! Your mind is overcome by fever. Your cells divide and you scream to sky, ‘FEVER!!’ And of course, men will be eating watermelon. Any question?”
M-I-C...see you real soon.

2 comments:

Mike said...

Emily wrote that, dummy.

Spoodles said...

Fixed. Thanks, Mike.