Thursday, July 27, 2006

The Daily Chronicle: Thursday, July 27, 2006

  • Kid Rock and Pamela Anderson plan to get married multiple times. Then they'll probably realize it just wasn't meant to be and go back to being disgusting alone.

  • Activists are protesting a pair of "beer-swilling pigs." Meanwhile, beer-swilling pigs are protesting for more peanuts.
    • Oh Jesus, that's an awful joke.

  • Maryland school students were caught distributing marijuana gumballs this week, creating the thought of a texture that makes me sick to my stomach.

  • "Ice cold watermelon less nutritious." Ice cold black stereotypes must find antioxidants elsewhere.

  • CATEGORY: "Medical Mystery." CLUE: "A Mother's Touch Solves It." QUESTION: "What is a raging boner?"
    • "I'm sorry. That's incorrect."
      • Alex Trebek.
        • Is a robot.
  • The founder of AOL offered an apology for merging with Time Warner a few years back. Still unrepentant about AIM Triton.

Slow news day, I guess...nothing really worth joking about.

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