Thank you for shmutting up

One of my closest friends at work--or, one of the closest things to a friend at work--is That Person That Coughs. You may already know her. Any time there is an odor in the air that could be slightly offensive (or only mildly inoffensive), she'll let out a little, forced hack. Something between an "a-hem" and a "blaaaargh" on the Mohs Scale of Mouthal Noises.

We were walking--outdoors--the other day, and somebody nearby was enjoying the refreshing coolness of a Virginia Slim or something. Coughy Magoo started going haywire. Anyone who knows me is aware that I'd rather put Hitler's wiener in my mouth than a cig. Still, there's something to be said about respecting other people's choices. The out-of-doors is really the only place people can smoke nowadays. If you don't like it, we can go right over there, which is also outside and smoke-free.

There is a guy in the building who is a total dickhat and he wears a bottle of cologne on his neck and cajones every day. He is absolutely dripping with it. He also has a history with Babs Coughingham, who whips out the nonsense hacking whenever he walks by. Sorry, lady, but I would die for this man's god-given right to be a smelly douchebag.
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Some brief reviews...

I was going to try to review Superbad without using any tired movie-review clichés, but that would involve too much work. Instead, I will say that Superbad is super and not bad! In fact, it is supergood! You know...if you like vulgar jokes about weiners and boobs. And I most certainly do.

Inland Empire is pretty much the most extreme opposite of Superbad that you could conjure up. There are random dance parties and talking rabbits. As silly as it sounds, it's actually one of the most haunting films I've seen in some time. While director David Lynch abandoned the idea of making narrative sense years ago, nobody sets a mood like him.

Part of Lynch's trademark is the beautiful camerawork and cinematography found in his films, and I'm sorry to say that this movie really is the (first) exception. Shot entirely on a handheld digital camera that you could easily buy in any store, the video quality looks like something you could download from Youtube. Obviously not as laggy or glitchy, of course, but the video in this picture is quite clearly pixellated. Even video tape would probably come off more beautifully. It's a shame that Lynch claims he'll never go back to film.

And it's not only the relatively cheap-o cameras used for Inland Empire either. Take, for example, Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones or Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. These movies were shot on top-of-the-line digital cameras, and they look--in my opinion--shitty as balls. Yes, that shitty. Compare the first prequel--Episode I: The Phantom Menace, which was shot almost entirely on film--and the difference in quality is quite clear.

Which, in a roundabouts way, brings me to my last feature film review: The Force Among Us. The movie is a documentary about Star Wars fans around the world, featuring interviews from fan club presidents and podcast hosts and Imperial Stormtroopers and any number of other Wars nerds. I loved the film, personally, because I can see a lot of myself in it. However, I'm not sure how well it would work for somebody that has never geeked out on Star Wars toys or obsessively cataloged characters from Return of the Jedi.

There are a number of interesting points in the movie--visits to locations from the filmings among them--but the most gripping is actually the story of the film's director, Christian Macht. His Star Wars story is by far the most moving and gripping in the film, and a great deal of it went on the cutting room floor. I can imagine the director cutting out some of his own segments for fear that it would become a movie about him, but after watching what was cut from his interviews, I would say that it would make for a much stronger film and narrative with it.

If you're nerdy like me, pick it up.