You know what? It's been a year since I started Robot Hand is the Future. I started out writing about news, and got into writing reviews and articles. But you know what? I've really lost focus of what this thing is all about. There's been a presence on this page that I haven't even mentioned in something like ten months.
What's goin' on, little guy?
I love Marshmallow Peeps. I really mean it. If I could marry them, I'd--let me rephrase that. If there were a proper orifice on their cute, pastel bodies, I would make sweet marshmallow love to them.
So in addition to my super-awesome reviews, I'm going to throw my focus back on Peeps for a bit. I've built up such a huge collection of Peeps that I literally am running out of room. Because of that, I have decided to break into them and do the right thing--eat them. They're all stale and hard and good and wonderful.
Marshmallow Peeps Spooky Cats, vintage 2006.
These were bought in September 2006. They were opened and consumed in March of 2007.
Pertinent info: Serving size is 4 cats. Calories: 130. Fat: 0g. These are not vegan because they contain gelatin in their ingredients. Gelatin is made of horses' hooves. The more you know. Marshmallow Peeps Spooky Cats are not a significant source of fiber, vitamin A, vitamin C, calcium, or iron, but they are a significant source of tasting good.
This is the Mohs Scale of Peep Hardness. The lower the number, the fresher and squishier the Peep is. These Peeps were just about in the middle--a 3.5. They were chewy and malleable, much like a real cat.
The Spooky Cats are plain, white, Peeps marshmallow, covered with a blackish sugar. The eyes and whiskers are white.
I've never been the type to make claims that different colored foods taste different. I have friends that swear to this day that M&Ms each have their own, distinct flavors. These friends are assholes. Still, there was something a little "off" about my Spooky Cats. I'd imagine it has something to do with the black coloring included in the package. My mom tells me that black decorating color tastes bad. My mom also tells me that touching myself is sinful. WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LET ME HAVE FUN, MOM?
I ate these in any number of ways. Regular-style, they were chewy. Frozen, they were magnificent and textural. Microwaved for about fifteen seconds and they were poofed up and good. Tasted just like a toasted marshmallow. Microwaved for thirty seconds and OH SHIT.
Spooky Cat...we hardly knew ye. This is a scan of the package. Good day.
Here's to another year of Robot Hand is the Future, and here's to many, many more decades of Marshmallow Peeps variations for me to scan.